


swallowed in the sea

by huni



Category: NCT (Band)
Genre: Fake/Pretend Relationship, Falling In Love, Light Angst, M/M, Slow Burn, Unrequited Love, Weddings, doyoung is a little shit, the wedding date movie inspo
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-11-04
Updated: 2020-11-25
Packaged: 2021-03-09 01:20:47
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 8,638
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27376357
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/huni/pseuds/huni
Summary: Jaehyun finds himself desperate, to the point where he hires a male escort to be his boyfriend for a week.
Relationships: Jung Yoonoh | Jaehyun & Suh Youngho | Johnny, Jung Yoonoh | Jaehyun/Suh Youngho | Johnny
Comments: 16
Kudos: 94





	1. tied with a ribbon

_Some people won't sail the sea because they're safer on land_

That’s it, that’s the moment they first meet in real life. Jaehyun only knew him through an announcement in the newspaper, and then through text messages. He never saw his face before, or heard his voice, but the recommendations on his name were the most positive Jaehyun could find for what he wanted.

The older man’s presence makes Jaehyun nervous, the palms of his hands already wet with sweat. He has never done anything similar to that in his entire life; to be honest, he never thought of doing anything like that ever. But there he is, in front of the most gorgeous man Jaehyun’s eyes have ever seen.

He’s wearing a suit, a very pretty one, that fits perfectly around every inch of his body. The dark blue complements the light brown color in his hair and the soft tan of his skin. His posture is perfect, and everytime he takes the mug in front of him to take a sip from it, Jaehyun finds himself mesmerized by such mundane acts as drinking coffee. But when Johnny does it, Jaehyun is almost left speechless.

“Well, nice to finally meet you, Jaehyun.” Johnny says and of course, his voice sounds heavenly. Not as deep as Jaehyun imagined, but enough to make Jaehyun’s ears turn reddish as he listens Johnny speak “I imagine you’ve never done something like this before? By your nervousness I assume this is your first time.”

Jaehyun tries not to ignore the sexual tone Johnny gave to what he said, but it’s very difficult when Johnny’s voice sounds so sexy for no reason, aside from Johnny being so attractive without even trying anything.

It’s still  _ only _ nine in the morning and Jaehyun have bigger and more serious business to discuss with Johnny, so he sighs deeply, trying not to be so transparent in front of Johnny. In some way, Jaehyun doesn’t want to look insecure in front of him. Maybe because Johnny sounds confident about everything, he could explain astronomy to Jaehyun and Jaehyun would believe every word that leaves his lips.

“Y-yeah…” Jaehyun stutters, cursing himself in his mind. He drinks from his orange juice, taking a deep breath and remading himself that he’s in charge there. Johnny is the one who should be intimidated “I never thought I would necessarily need to do something like this, but… Well, I don’t know a better solution than this.”

“How about take a real date with you?” Jaehyun just met Johnny, so he knows nothing about the man, but his words had a bit of disdain in it “Don’t get me wrong, if people had real dates all the time, I wouldn’t have as much work as I do. But genuinely asking, why hire a hooker to go with you?”

_ It’s not that easy _ .

Jaehyun takes his time to find the words to tell Johnny  _ why _ exactly he needs to hire a companion to take as a date to his best friend’s wedding. First, Yuta’s wedding isn’t the issue here. Jaehyun loves his fiancée, she’s the perfect match for Yuta and Jaehyun has nothing to complain about it.

The problem is that Doyoung will be there. Not only that he’s the ultimate, and possibly only, love interest Jaehyun has ever had, but also Doyoung is bringing his brand new boyfriend, Jungwoo.

When Jaehyun first heard about it, his heart probably stopped for a second. He could feel his chest getting tighter as Taeyong continued to tell him about Doyoung and Jungwoo. They met at work and they’ve been together for a couple of months now. Every new relationship Doyoung have, it’s the same feeling swallowing Jaehyun, surrounding him until he’s almost breathless. This time it hurts even more, because taking the new boyfriend to Yuta’s wedding is  _ serious _ , and Jaehyun knows Doyoung too much to know he wouldn’t invite someone to go with him if it didn’t mean something to him.

Deep inside, Jaehyun knew this day was coming, he just wished it wasn’t this soon. He needed more time, even if he already had a couple of years to get over this nonsense he calls still being in love with one of his best friends.

Jaehyun tries not to think about it too hard, now it’s not the time for it “I wanted someone to impress others and someone I could have total control of. Bringing a real date would be kind of risky.”

It’s not even true, but saying it out loud, it sounds like a reasonable excuse. 

“Someone you could control? We should put some rules into this contract then.” Johnny asks, and again Jaehyun senses the super sensual tone in his voice again “Also, thank you for saying I will impress your friends, even if I’m not sure in which way you mean.”

_ In every way, _ Jaehyun thinks. Johnny is handsome, charming, polite and could possibly seduce every person that crosses path with him. This is the moment their friends have been waiting so much for Jaehyun, the day he would forget about Doyoung and move on with his life; Johnny is the perfect boyfriend he could introduce to his group of friends in a time like this.

“What kind of rules?” Jaehyun stares at him, raising one of his eyebrows.

“Boundaries.” Johnny says “If we’re going to spend a week together pretending to be boyfriends, we need to put some limits, mine and yours.”

Jaehyun tries to think of things he didn’t  _ want _ Johnny to do with him; there’s only a few, and to be honest, even those he wouldn’t mind if in the end it happened. He tries to erase that thought from his mind, this wasn’t the time for it.

“For starters, everything you do with me has a price.” Johnny sounds calm, obviously he already has done that billions of times, with every type of person Jaehyun can think of. But Jaehyun isn’t used to paying for anything like this “You already know the price for me to be your date this week and kisses are included in it, but there’s things aside from it, like sexual intimacies.”

Jaehyun’s face becomes hot and before Johnny can say anything else, he blurts out “I don’t need the price for that, we won’t do anything aside from what we already agreed on doing.”

He’s a grown man, with experience, but Jaehyun still feels the embarrassment making his body uncomfortable. Johnny speaking about such matters in the middle of a café - while having breakfast - makes the thirteen-year-old Jaehyun take control of his body, completely flustered.

“If this is your final decision.” Jaehyun nods when Johnny looks at him “So, no intimacy aside, only when we are around the others?” 

“Yes.”

“As you wish, Jaehyun.” Johnny finishes his coffee, a smirk escaping from his lips, making Jaehyun’s ears red once again “When are we leaving for the wedding then?”

\--

Jaehyun met his best friends when they were still in school. Taeyong and Doyoung were friends since birth, they met when they were still very young, and Jaehyun appeared in their lives during elementary school. Yuta was the last to join the group, only becoming their friends when they were in high school.

When they grew up, it became difficult to gather the whole squad together. All of them had different routines, different jobs and Yuta lived in a city nearby them. They could only meet on special occasions and holidays. That’s why Yuta wanted them to spend the week of his wedding together, just like old times.

The wedding would happen in the small city they grew up, very simple and only for close friends and family. Jaehyun liked that, so he didn’t have to act too much in front of a crowd, only for a few people.

“So again, I’m here to cause jealousy in your friend that is also your ex-boyfriend?” Johnny asks, he insisted on driving the car for Jaehyun, and Jaehyun doesn't mind it too much, also Johnny looks even sexier driving.

“Not exactly jealousy, he has a boyfriend after all. But I want to show that I moved on, for everyone.” In Jaehyun’s mind it sounds cohesive, even if it was a lie, his friends would be happy that he finally gave up on Doyoung and the relationship they had.

“For how long have you been linking this friend?” 

Jaehyun stops to think a little. He doesn’t remember when it all started. “I don’t know, actually, but probably when we were in high school. You know, hormones. And Doyoung started to look hot all of a sudden. Almost unfair how handsome he became in a year. From our group of friends, Doyoung is the least to show affection, but with me he would always treat me too kindly. We started dating in university and it was like living a dream, something I never expected, but about two years ago he ended things with me, without explanation and here I am.”

“Does he know?” Johnny looks at Jaehyun with the corner of his eyes, trying to maintain contact when talking without taking his eyes off the road “That you still like him?”

“Definitely not, we’ve made a promise that we would only date if it wouldn’t interfere in our friendship, so when things ended I pretended it was fine by me.” Jaehyun didn’t need to tell Yuta or Taeyong about still being in love with Doyoung, they found out by themselves eventually. 

Johnny doesn’t say anything for a moment, looking straight to the road “And why do you still hold onto this feeling you have for your friend? Why haven’t you given up already?”

That’s a question Jaehyun doesn’t know how to answer, because there’s no explanation to it - it’s totally irrational. He already knows now he has zero chances with Doyoung again, because if he had the slightest of chance, it would have already happened. But there’s something about the way he feels about Doyoung that he doesn’t want to let go.

“I’ve been feeling like this for so long that I don’t know who I am without it. I think it will stay forever by my side and I guess I’m okay with it.”

It sounds pitiful when saying it out loud, and Jaehyun notices it with Johnny’s reaction. He’s not exactly tense, but his expression looks a lot more serious than before. Jaehyun thought Johnny would say something flirty about it to him, but he looks like he’s really thinking about something to say. Something meaningful.

“This is only your decision to make, Jaehyun. You fancying your best friend doesn’t define you as a person. You need to learn that you have more than just that, your life isn’t just about it, right?” Johnny sounds sincere when saying that and Jaehyun feels a little thankful for it. He’s the first person to deal with Jaehyun about this issue in such a serious and caring way.

“You’re right…” 

Even if Johnny’s words wouldn’t change things that have been going inside of Jaehyun for years, it’s nice to hear his words, it made Jaehyun’s chest a little less loaded.

When they arrive in the small city, Jaehyun can feel his fingers tingling and his heart beat a little faster than normal. They would only meet the others the next day, but just the thought of everyone reunited again, makes him giddy with excitement. Also, Jaehyun never brought a boyfriend for them to meet.

There will be too much happening during this week. 

\--

“Do you remember everything we prepared, right?” Jaehyun almost shouts, so Johnny can listen to him from inside the bathroom.

“Do you take me as an amator, Jaehyun?” Johnny comes out of the bathroom, towel covering only the bottom part of his body.

Without the fancy clothes he normally uses, now Jaehyun can see how defined Johnny’s torso is, the water still dripping from his skin. His hair is messy and for a moment Jaehyun prefers this look in him the most, even if he can only possibly see it when Johnny is out of the shower. 

“Of course not, just making sure everything will go as planned.” Jaehyun tries to look somewhere else, not giving a glance in Johnny’s direction, especially his body.

Jaehyun is already nervous with everything going on. He’s about to introduce a fake boyfriend to the people that know him the best in his life. Having to act in front of his best friends will be difficult enough, Jaehyun doesn’t need Johnny’s body to distract him from doing everything perfectly so the week will go on smoothly. 

“I remember everything, relax.” Johnny says “We met in a pub, you drank a little too much and took courage to make a move on me, but me, being the gentleman I am, only helped you go home safely and called you the next day.” 

Even if Jaehyun is looking directly at the window of his room, staring at every cloud and bird that passes by in the sky, he still can see with the corner of his eyes Johnny putting his clothes on, buttoning his shirt and zipping up his pants. He holds back the urge to just lay down in his bed and watch Johnny dress up in front of him.

Johnny puts a white button-up shirt, with black jeans and social shoes. He brushes his hair up, showing off his forehead. Even if Jaehyun thinks he’s dressed up fancier than Johnny, there’s something that makes Johnny seem more elegant, maybe it’s the hair.

Johnny uses his hand to help dry his hair faster, looking even sexier, if it was even possible. In the past few hours, Jaehyun experienced every kind of attraction he could probably feel for a person. Having to share a room with Johnny is really tempting, especially when he sleeps only with his underwear.

Even if they didn’t share a bed because Johnny volunteered himself to sleep on the couch, having his presence around Jaehyun at night was already enough. Jaehyun knows it’s a normal reaction to Johnny, his job is to seduce everyone around him and make them pay for it, so he doesn’t mind it too much.

Thinking about anything related to Johnny is priceless and wouldn’t hurt anyone.

“My parents loved you.” Jaehyun says, changing his clothes too. They should meet the others for lunch, so he needed to get ready.

“As expected.” Johnny smirks at Jaehyun, liking what he said “Winning parents’ hearts is my ability. They will never think of a better person to be with you than me.”

“Probably my mom thinks she’s the better person to be with  _ you. _ ” He couldn’t blame his mother for being so lured by Johnny, Jaehyun feels the same way as her.

“Don’t be jealous, she’s your mother.” Johnny says, then continues, “Also, I’m all yours this week. I won’t have eyes for anyone else.”

Jaehyun can feel his face getting redder with Johnny’s phrase. He thinks that ignoring it’s better than answering anything and getting more embarrassed with Johnny’s words.

“Are you ready? We should head to Yuta’s house already.” Jaehyun speaks.

Johnny splashes perfume on his body and hair, and says “Yes, let’s go.”

_ He smells amazing _ .

\--

The first time everyone meets in that week is during lunch in Yuta’s parents house. Everything is familiar to Jaehyun and the suffocating feeling he has been feeling seems to loosen up a little. It feels like home and Jaehyun shouldn’t be afraid of going back there. Aside from the little changes that happened through the years, that’s still Jaehyun’s second house, where he spent so many memorables times with his best friends.

The family and friends are all there and Jaehyun makes sure to introduce Johnny to everyone.Especially to Doyoung and his boyfriend Jungwoo, which in Jaehyun’s first impressions, seemed like a nice guy. Now, Jaehyun having a new boyfriend is surprising to a few of them, because didn’t have anyone else after Doyoung. But now he's accompanied by his gorgeous and brand new  _ boyfriend _ . 

“He looks so perfect.” Taeyong says to Jaehyun after a glass of wine, Johnny is talking to Yuta, near where they are standing “Almost too perfect to be true.”

“I know, it’s annoying.” Jaehyun lets out a sigh.

“Annoying?” Taeyong laughs, looking at his friend “You should like his perfection and show him off to others more.”

Jaehyun grimaces “He’s my boyfriend not an award, Taeyong.”

“Unless you like to compete with him and now you’re losing, so you feel annoyed by how hot he looks and…” Taeyong continues to talk, putting a lot more sexual meaning to his words than Jaehyun wished he did.

Doyoung passes through them, alone “What the hell are you two talking about? Competition about who looks hotter?” 

Jaehyun controls his heart and stops it from doing a flip inside his chest. Doyoung looks extremely handsome, as always, almost too much to be true. Almost too much to be fair.

“Just appreciating Jaehyun’s new boyfriend.” Taeyong takes another sip from his drink and Jaehyun realises he might be getting a little drunk already.

Taeyong continues to drink his liquor, gulping the wine.

“It’s weird that now I have a competitor.” Doyoung says, giving a grin to both of his friends. Taeyong immediately rolls his eyes, Jaehyun just lets out a nervous laugh “Don’t you agree, Jaehyun?”

“With what?” 

“That before your new boyfriend arrived, I was the hotter in our group.” That’s bullshit, Doyoung already knows the answer and it’s yes. 

“You were hotter during high school days, but now I can see some wrinkles around your eyes.” Taeyong sinalizes Doyoung’s eye area, who stops smiling and touches his face.

“What? No.”

“Yes, I can see your age showing through your skin now.” Taeyong continues to drink “You should take more care of yourself, Doyoung.”

“You say this because you look like a teen when you’re almost in your thirties.” Doyoung sounds _ really  _ offended “I just have matured skin.”

Taeyong shrugs “Matured is a nice word, you just look old.”

Jaehyun feels like running away.

“He’s just messing with you.” Jaehyun says because Doyoung is the type to get insulted by those kinds of things and of course Taeyong is very aware of that.

“Am I?” Taeyong continues to drink from his glass, not looking at them anymore.

Before Taeyong and Doyoung would start discussing Doyoung's wrinkles, or whatever, Johnny’s stare crosses with Jaehyun. He doesn’t have to say anything for Johnny to understand that he’s not very comfortable in his position and should come help him.

After Doyoung and Jaehyun broke up, Doyoung and Taeyong’s friendship was never the same, and always Jaehyun would be in the middle of their bickering, but now he’s relieved he has Johnny to interfere and save him.

Johnny walks to where they are, not breaking eye contact with Jaehyun for a second. He’s quick and within seconds Jaehyun already feels Johnny’s hands running through his back, embracing him from his side. Jaehyun hugs his shoulder, getting closer to Johnny’s hot body. 

“Everything is fine? By your face, I thought you were about to cry.” Jaehyun just nods, letting out a breath he’s been holding on and feeling a lot calmer. 

Doyoung coughs beside them and Jaehyun remembers they are still there. Taeyong is looking with lovely eyes at them, “You look so good together.” He starts “But I still want to steal him from you, Jaehyun.”

Taeyong’s jokes are harmless, so Jaehyun laughs when he says it. Also, it’s good to be accompanied by the most desired man in the room, even if he’s not the first option you wanted to be accompanied by.

“So how did you two meet?” Doyoung asks after a minute of silence “I hope it’s not weird for you to know that we are still best friends after breaking up, we’re friends before ex-boyfriends.”

“Not at all, I trust Jaehyun and know he had his own life before me. There’s no reason for me to be weirded by your friendship.” Johnny gives him a smile, holding tight to Jaehyun’s waist “But answering your other question, we’ve met in a pub.”

Jaehyun looks at Johnny, because he didn’t tell the rest of their made up story, only the first part of it. 

“In a pub alone? That’s not very Jaehyun as I remember.” Doyoung says “He’s not the type to go out alone, especially to a pub.”

“Apparently things changed.” Johnny says it in a calm tone that Jaehyun didn’t feel like he was attacking Doyoung, just stating facts.

Well, in theory, Jaehyun really have changed. They only don’t need to know all the truth to it.

To cut the awkward atmosphere around them, Jaehyun speaks “I used to get really shy when younger, but now I guess I can handle going to a pub alone.” Jaehyun smiles to them, then turning to Johnny “I saw you speaking to Yuta, I hope he didn’t tell you any weird story about me.”

“Only that you used to get on the balconies of the pubs around here, dancing and singing to Donna Summer out loud.” Jaehyun feels embarrassed, but also the memories of those times makes him happy “That doesn’t seem like what a shy person would do.”

“Most of the times I did this I was drunk, okay?” Jaehyun says, chuckling in the middle of the sentence, the way Johnny is looking at him makes him flustered - and hot inside.

Even if Jaehyun felt like exploding inside, because of Taeyong and Doyoung and Johnny finding out about what he used to do when he was younger, he wanted to stay there talking to Johnny and telling him funny stories Jaehyun had with his friends. But it’s already around noon and Yuta came inside and told everyone inside the house that the lunch was being served outside.

Taeyong and Doyoung disappear as soon as Yuta calls for them to go eat, leaving Johnny and Jaehyun alone. Johnny offers to get a new drink for him and Jaehyun, and the latter agrees, letting go of Johnny’s body “We meet outside.”

Johnny goes to where the drinks are being served, there’s a bartender helping people to get what they want and he gives Johnny two glasses filled with cold white wine. He heads outside, to where everyone is having their lunch, in a big wood table that could fit almost everyone in the party. 

The house is almost empty because everyone is already outside eating.  _ Almost _ empty - Johnny can hear whispers coming from the living room next to where he is. Even if he doesn’t want to eavesdrop, he still can hear what they are talking about.

“I’m not telling him, that’s final.” The whispers sound aggressive, as if they’re discussing something.

“It’s only fair, he needs to know what happened.” The other answers “And it’s better if we tell him before he finds out alone.”

“It’s been years and he has no idea of what happened, it’s not necessary.” 

They continue on this small discussion that Johnny, for some reason, stopped his way to listen to it. Especially because he recognizes both the voices. 

It’s Doyoung and Taeyong. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hi!!!  
> hope it was a good reading for now heh sorry for any mistakes and feedbacks are always welcome!  
> thanks for reading and see you next time <3
> 
> you can find me on twt [here](https://twitter.com/chsoobi) :)


	2. little by little

“Win this for me.” Jaehyun whispers onto Johnny’s ear before backing away from him. He decided not to join the card game this round, so he could watch and cheer for Johnny. 

“Only if I have my reward afterwards.” Johnny winks at him and Jaehyun can’t decide if he’s playing with him, or if he said that out loud so others could hear. Either way, Jaehyun feels flustered by it because he can hear the giggles coming from his friends on the other side of the table.

It’s a nice night, perfect for their so awaited reunion. The breeze is welcoming and brushes Jaehyun’s skin softly. The weather, company and feelings, it all reminds him of his younger years, when he used to spend all summer playing cards in Yuta’s parent house until midnight.

After a whole day of celebrating their arrival for the wedding week, lots of good food and drinks, now it’s only their close friends and their companions. Jaehyun can notice how happy Yuta looks too, it’s almost as if he’s shining in front of everyone, smiling the brightest and laughing the most. Seeing everyone together again like this, it’s something Jaehyun wants to remember and treasure for the rest of his days. 

Now that the first day is almost ending, Jaehyun feels a lot lighter with his situation with Johnny too. He blended well with everyone, Jaehyun doesn’t feel like he needs to work hard to make others believe he’s in love with this man. Not because he actually is, but Johnny makes this pretending thing seem so easy and natural, even Jaehyun would believe him if he wasn’t the one in this situation. 

_ “Even my grandma have noticed how happy you look now.” _ Yuta told him earlier, making a big smile cross Jaehyun’s face, everything is going according to his plan.

The only obstacle Jaehyun have now is Johnny himself. He still has to deal with Johnny being so attractive all the time, how he knows exactly what to say, how he acts like Jaehyun is the only thing is his world and how he’s so charming without even trying too hard. Jaehyun didn’t know he had this weakass heart, but he feels all kinds of things next to Johnny. 

In the end, Johnny is a professional in this, someone that have been working to seduce others for some years now, and Jaehyun wonders if this is how everyone that hires him starts to feel about him at some point.

It’s not jealousy, but there’s a peculiar feeling inside Jaehyun’s chest when he thinks about it. Jaehyun isn’t the first to pay him to do this job and probably won’t be the last, but Jaehyun asks himself if Johnny have someone. Someone that doesn’t have to pay for his affection, someone Johnny doesn’t have to act because his feelings are real for them. And for the first time, the reality hits too hard when Jaehyun thinks about it. 

There’s someone out there that doesn't have to pay to have him like this all the time.

Looking at his past and only relationship, Jaehyun would probably only have this kind of thing if he paid for it, like in this situation. Some people have no luck in love and maybe that’s only how like life works after all.

“Fuck…” Jaehyun can hear Doyoung shout, trying not to be so loud, because it’s already late at night.

“Oh, you lost again, Doie.” Jungwoo says. Jaehyun haven’t spoken to him directly yet, he’s taking his time, but Jungwoo is always there, obviously. 

“He’s cheating, I’m sure of it.” Doyoung says pointing to Johnny. Johnny just smirks and puts his hands up, trying to look innocent.

Johnny looks anything, but innocent. 

“Accept you lost, Doyoung.” Yuta is laughing at Doyoung’s perplexed face. Doyoung is the type of person that hates to lose things, he’s the competitive kind.

Doyoung snorts, the air that escapes from his mouth brushing his bangs to the side “All of you are against me.” 

“Being this bad of a player, we definitely are.” Jaehyun speaks, catching everyone’s attention. All eyes are watching him, some of them seem amused by what he said - Doyoung looks surprised.

As he should, because Jaehyun never spoke to him in that way. But everyone seems to be enjoying Jaehyun's rebellious side. 

Before Doyoung can start a scene, Jungwoo - in a humorous tone -, announces that they’re calling it a day and going home “This will be a very busy week, we need to rest well.” He says, chuckling with the others “Also, Doyoung has already passed the point, I have no idea if he’s too drunk or too tired.”

Doyoung grimaces at what Jungwoo is saying, but everyone is having fun. Even Jaehyun, he thinks they have a good dynamic. Jungwoo doesn’t feel trapped in Doyoung like Jaehyun felt when they were together. The new boyfriend looks carefree and funny, and unlike Jaehyun, he knows how to tame Doyoung very well.

When they leave, the others start to do the same, Yuta and his fiancé look relieved, probably because they’re the most tired of them all. Jaehyun and Johnny are one of the last ones, and Jaehyun makes sure to give a very strong hug to his best friend.

Their houses are close to each other. The perks of living in a small city is that you live nearby all your friends. In the morning, they went by car there, but for dinner, Jaehyun and Johnny decided to go by walking, so there’s another five blocks of walking until Jaehyun’s parents house.

The weather is good for a walk in the night. 

Everything is silent, only the steps of the two of them walking on the streets. Jaehyun can see the clear sky above them, not a single cloud floating. He likes to watch the sky during night in his hometown, the stars shine brighter compared to when they are in the big city. Like everything in that small city, this gives Jaehyun a nostalgic and warm feeling inside of him.

He thinks that now everything seems different, but similar at the same time.

When they were younger, Doyoung would walk him home when it was too late for him to go alone. Johnny is nothing like him, because he’s quiet, when Doyoung would talk all the way to Jaehyun’s house. But there’s something endearing about Johnny’s silence, something that makes Jaehyun enjoy more the details in their walking.

Jaehyun can notice Johnny’s breath, steady and calm. His hands are inside his front pockets and Jaehyun thinks that’s a very attractive trait of Johnny, to look sensual even with only the small of things.

Johnny’s head is tilted a little, his eyes staring at the shiny stars above them.

“I think I’ve never seen a sky so beautiful like this one.” Johnny finally says, breaking the silence between them “It’s so… vivid.”

“So you’ve never left the big city, right?” Jaehyun laughs “This is the sky we see everyday here.” 

“Easy way to know I’m a city boy, huh.” Johnny grins to Jaehyun “But I like the sparkly sky, almost as beautiful as you.”

Jaehyun tries not to choke with what Johnny said, and tries to hide it out with a laugher “Nice one, Johnny.”

Johnny winks at him, but doesn't say anything, just goes back to staring at the sky. That makes a question pop in Jaehyun’s head, something he already thought about before, but didn’t know if it was too rude to ask about those things to Johnny. If he uses the right words, maybe he can manage to not offend the latter.

“Can I ask you something?” Jaehyun starts, Johnny just nods “Why have you decided to start doing this job?” 

Johnny seems to stop for a moment to think and that makes Jaehyun anxious with his question, after all, that was nothing of his business.

“My mom was a stripper and she would take me to her job when I was a kid, so I grew up in the middle of sex and acohool and ended up here.” Johnny says, looking at Jaehyun, that just stayed quiet “That’s what you thought I would say, right?”

Jaehyun is dumbfounded “N-No, I just…”

Johnny takes a deep breath “There’s no why for me to have become who I am, especially one that involves my family. I like my job and have always liked it.”

Jaehyun is torn between saying sorry or staying silent. He did know this was something beyond their intimacy for him to ask, but he was curious about it. Jaehyun feels guilty, but forgives himself for doing it out of curiosity.

“Don’t worry too much about it, I get questioned about it all the time.” Johnny only says that, leaving the silence to grow again.

Even if he’s still curious about the beginning of what Johnny is today, it’s not his place to dig even more there. He just wants to enjoy the few more minutes he still has with Johnny while walking. They will sleep under the same roof and in the same room again, but this moment, the stars, the breeze and Johnny - Jaehyun wants to cherish it all.

\--

The week is busy, especially because Jaehyun is Yuta’s best man. He goes with Yuta to his last fitting for his suit, which Jaehyun approves one hundred percent. The floral shop, Yuta and his fiancée decided for simple and white flowers for the decoration, they were almost ready and done for the wedding. Jaehyun goes back to his house for lunch, where he meets a very comfortable Johnny speaking to Jaehyun’s parents in the living room.

After lunch, Jaehyun is supposed to meet with Yuta and his bride, and also Taeyong and Doyoung for dancing classes. Yuta insisted that they should get dance classes too, his best men needed to be as good dancers as him. Johnny accompanied him, because they would dance together in the wedding, as partners.

The dance teacher is bubbly, more than normal, but Jaehyun likes her energy. Also, she guides them when learning to dance properly. Jaehyun isn’t the best slow dancer, or dancer in general, he knows a couple of moves, but dancing with another person is a lot more difficult.

“Be careful with my feet.” Johnny holds Jaehyun by his waist and takes his hand with his own. Jaehyun lets out a nervous laugh, looking at their feet before starting to move through the saloon. 

“1, 2, 3…” The teacher continues to count out loud for everyone to listen.

It’s a lot easier than Jaehyun anticipated, mostly because Johnny was leading him the whole way. His strong arms are jugging Jaehyun very tight, leaving no space for Jaehyun to mess up anything. After catching Johnny’s rhythm, Jaehyun felt more comfortable to not only follow whatever Johnny was doing, but doing things himself too.

It’s fun. Dancing is fun and being this close to Johnny is fun too. Jaehyun could feel Johnny’s muscles under his clothes, moving and fitting perfectly with Jaehyun’s body as they danced. Jaehyun could feel the atmosphere surrounding them and for a moment he totally forgot the others were in the room.

Jaehyun could only focus on Johnny's grin and how he moved closer and closer to Jaehyun’s body. The song wasn’t sensual in any way, but coming from Johnny, it wasn’t a surprise that Jaehyun found himself enjoying the more steamy movements Johnny did.

They feel so in sink, it’s natural for them to dance together like this. Even if Jaehyun doesn’t normally slow dance too much, he enjoys doing it with Johnny. He feels close to his partner, and the most important thing, he feels secure with him. They could spend the rest of the day dancing and Jaehyun wouldn’t mind at all.

“Okay, now switch partners!” The teacher speaks almost screaming, but only enough for them to listen.

Johnny ends up with the bride, who smiles big at him. Jaehyun couldn’t blame her for being happy that she gets the chance to dance a bit with him.

Jaehyun is left with Doyoung. He offers his hand to Jaehyun, who accepts it right away. When they were together, Jaehyun doesn’t have the memory of ever dancing like this with Doyoung. But it’s nothing out of the ordinary for Jaehyun.

Doyoung have rhythm and knows how to lead Jaehyun, but he’s not as smooth as Jaehyun’s original partner. Not that Jaehyun wants to compare anyone in his situation, but if he did, Doyoung would be losing again. 

The slow song stops and a faster and brighter one starts “Go back to your partners!” The teacher says.

With no time, Jaehyun is in Johnny's arms again, looking happier than before. Of course, Johnny knows how to dance to this type of music too. It’s a lot more lustful, filled with a flirtatious aura around them. 

“I didn’t know you were this good of a dancer.” Jaehyun says, trying not to show how much he was actually enjoying it.

“I can say the same about you.” Johnny grins at Jaehyun “But I’m discovering a lot of things about you, I think.”

As he says it, Jaehyun can feel Johnny’s hand moving around his waist, lowering a bit more than Jaehyun thought it was appropriate, but he didn’t stop Johnny from doing it.

Jaehyun, without thinking too much, gets closer to Johnny and gives a kiss on the corner of Johnny’s neck, staying there for some seconds when realizing what he did. He wishes he didn’t do it, because now he doesn’t want to look back at Johnny, so he stays there, his face hidden on Johnny’s neck.

“That’s it guys, thanks for coming to the class!” The teacher announces the ending of the class, and Jaehyun feels obligated to tear apart from Johnny.

Johnny stares at him for a couple of seconds when they get separated, his eyes speaking more than him. Jaehyun can notice a hint of surprise mixed with something that Jaehyun have already seen in Johnny’s eyes - desire.

“You two were so good at dancing! The teacher didn’t even have to help you with the movements.” Yuta says, going to where Johnny and Jaehyun are.

“We dance a lot together like this, that’s why.” Jaehyun says, looking away from Johnny’s glance. He imagines them slow dancing at home, after a long day at work. The soft song playing in the background, but nothing else matters when they are close together.

For a moment, a very brief one, Jaehyun wishes that what he imagines with Johnny could be true.

\--

“Don’t do anything I wouldn’t do.” 

“Ha, very funny.” Jaehyun says looking at Johnny. He’s walking with Jaehyun to Yuta’s bachelor’s party, bodies closer than Jaehyun imagined “I think there’s only a few things you wouldn’t do.”

“Exactly.” Johnny chuckles.

Even that walking with Johnny was something Jaehyun really enjoyed doing, he is still feeling more nervous than he normally feels. His hands are sweating because he will be alone there. Johnny decided to explore the small city alone for that day, looking for places that Jaehyun haven’t shown him already, and he’s going to leave his ‘boyfriend’ alone, so Jaehyun could enjoy it more. Being by himself in a situation like that made Jaehyun anxious. Wanting or not, Johnny felt like a safe place for him there.

“Okay, what is happening?” Johnny stops Jaehyun, turning to look directly into his eyes “You look like you will faint any time soon.”

“I’m just really nervous right now.” Jaehyun have two options: be totally honest, or pretend he’s like this normally. He decides to go with the first option “I’m concerned that you won’t be there with me and I’ll mess something up, or something will happen and you won’t be there with me.”

It’s more honest than Jaehyun wished it was, because now Johnny is only looking in his direction as if he’s gone mad. Johnny isn’t that important in Jaehyn’s life, he’s crazy for putting so much weight on Johnny's shoulders during such a small period of time and he’s aware of that.

“Sorry, I didn’t mean--”

Before Jaehyun can go on, Johnny cuts him “You don’t need me there, Jaehyun. You don’t need anyone else but yourself, and that’s something you should apply not only for me, but others too.”

Jaehyun knows he is dependable. He needs others by his side to feel like he can do things, even if he normally doesn’t say it out loud. He prefers to continue being insecure and scared than having to tell others he needs someone by his side to have courage.

“You’re like an open book to me, and as much as I see this insecure man afraid of the unknown, I can see this other side of you that desperately wants to discover new things. There’s no reason for you not to believe in yourself; you’re smart, funny and pretty handsome if you ask me.” Johnny says.

They’re still on the streets, but they feel so close to each other that it shouldn’t be appropriate. Even if what Johnny says is very simple and commun, it seems to have a different meaning to Jaehyun.

Jaehyun prefers to think that Johnny wants to see him grow and that’s why he says those things to him; Johnny wants him to set free whatever he’s holding back inside of him.

“I’ll try…” There’s not much Jaehyun can say at that moment, he can’t promise Johnny something he can’t even be sure with himself that he will do “I was about to say you help me a lot with these issues, but you would lecture me again, right?”

“Only if you say you listen to what I say because it’s me, not because it’ll help you.” 

Jaehyun smiles “Being you helps a little, but don’t get cocky about it.”

It’s a hot evening, probably the hottest in that summer and Jaehyun feels like melting, for more than one reason.

When they arrive at Yuta’s bachelor’s party, Johnny greets everyone and as soon as he arrives, he announces he’s leaving. They decided to go to a pub and drink until late at night, play games that Yuta enjoyed and spend time together. The pub is loaded, men are drinking bottles and bottles of beer and by Yuta’s face, he was having a lot of fun with them.

Before Johnny leaves the pub, he looks at everyone, watching him and Jaehyun carefully, but trying to not make it obvious. He grins in Jaehyun’s direction and holds his face with one hand, leaving a sweet and quick peek on Jaehyun’s lips.

Jaehyun opens his eyes wide for a moment, but then remembers that it should be normal for people dating and smiles at Johnny.

“See you at home.” Johnny almost whispers at Jaehyun, exiting the pub.

\--

Jaehyun decided to take it easy in the beginning, only drinking a drink or two and having a bottle of water in the middle of each drink. He doesn’t want to get drunk too soon, especially because it’s still day time outside the pub. 

Yuta approaches him, hugging Jaehyun by the shoulder and taking a mysterious cup - that Jaehyun didn’t know the owner of it - from the balcony in front of them and drank the liquid inside of it. He looks already very drunk, but very happy too, a big smile crossing his face.

“Are you enjoying the party, Jaehyun?”

“Being with you guys is enough for me to enjoy anything.” Yuta chuckles and Jaehyun lets out a giggle, even if what he said isn’t funny at all “Especially when you are all drunk.”

Yuta grimaces “This pub have a lot of our drunk stories.”

“It seems like it’s been ages since those days, but we were already in university.” Jaehyun can only smile and remember all the times he would spend nights in that pub drinking with his three best friends. 

“Yeah…” Yuta doesn’t sound as excited as he was before, his happy face almost gone and turning into a more serious one “Since those days, I’ve always wanted to say sorry to you.”

Jaehyun raises one of his eyebrows, confused. He tries to go back in his memories and remember a time where Yuta would need to apologize to Jaehyun, but he didn’t. He doesn’t remember any situation why Yuta should be sorry for.

“Sorry for what exactly?” Jaehyun’s voice almost cracks in the end of the sentence because he wasn’t expecting that at all. Yuta has always been straight forward and true to his feelings, for him to not say sorry for something when they were younger meant it was a very serious issue.

“For not being a good friend to you at that time, I guess.” Now Yuta sounds and looks sad, but Jaehyun still feels like there’s something he should know to understand why exactly Yuta is saying all of these things “I should’ve been more sincere to you, so I wanted to say I’m sorry for that.” 

“I don’t understand what do you mean, Yuta…” Jaehyun tries to say it out loud, because he didn’t feel like his voice was working normally right now “You’ve always been a great friend to me.”

Before Jaehyun can start to overthink the matter, Yuta opens a smile to him “I have, right?? That’s why I asked you to be my best man, so we should celebrate a lot together this week!” 

He hugs Jaehyun again, this time very tight. Jaehyun is still thinking about what Yuta said, about not being sincere and a good friend to him. Jaehyun always thought of Yuta as a great best friend, the more honest in their fantastic four group. Maybe it’s the feeling of getting married and regretting some things from the past, not that anything in particular ever happened between them, because Jaehyun is sure it never did. 

And Yuta is right, they should celebrate, like old times.

“Let’s drink for your happiness, then.” Jaehyun holds up his cup and drinks the liquor in it in one gulp.

It wasn’t in his plans to drink so much, but this was a week off for them, something they probably would only have when the next one marries too. So he drank, danced and enjoyed his time the most with his best friends. 

Taeyong is with him and Yuta, singing, or screaming, to that one  _ Ruby _ song that used to play on the radio when they were younger. With the corner of his eyes, he could see Doyoung and Jungwoo together, talking closely. For a moment, Jaehyun could forget about everything that went through all those years, and he didn’t care to see them together like that. They’re in a relationship after all, and there’s nothing he could possibly do. Doyoung is his ex-boyfriend and Jaehyun should start seeing him as only that.

A part of his heart was still aching, from the thought of letting go, moving on and making everything stay in the past. Doyoung meant so much to him, but he cherished him more than just that, he is his best friend too. 

Jaehyun wished Johnny was there. Scratch that, he didn’t wish Johnny to be there. He  _ desired _ Johnny to be there.

Every gulp in his drink felt like fire spreading in every inch of Jaehyun’s body, burning inside of him. He danced, and sang and enjoyed the evening like he didn’t do in a long time. Jaehyun remembers when he was younger, all the energy, confidence and freedom he felt he had. He was so different from what he is now, he was joyful and not as shy as he is now. He can remember being the most charming of the four of them, but now he feels like his light has faded away.

In that late afternoon and moment, Jaehyun had a small taste of what he used to be and he missed that.

He felt relieved.

It’s already night, but Yuta insisted that his best friends were the last ones to leave the party. They had a few -  _ a lot _ \- more drinks. Jaehyun, of course, went to sing on top of the balcony, taking off his shirt because it was too hot. 

The party continued until Yuta’s cell phone rang. It was his fiancé, telling him her party was over and she was waiting for him at home. Without thinking twice, Yuta ended his party and headed home.

Jaehyun was enjoying the party too much, but he also wanted to go back to his house. Even if his body was sore from dancing and drinking, he still had a lot of energy left inside of him. He takes a taxi with Taeyong to his house, and leaves a very drunk Taeyong in his own house first. 

The lights of Jaehyun’s living room were still on, and that makes him remember that his father used to wait for him every night he went to the pub with his friends. But when he gets inside, the one in the living room isn’t his dad, it’s Johnny. 

The person he’s been wanting to see since he left that pub earlier. 

“I was waiting for you to call in case you needed a ride--” Johnny starts to say, but Jaehyun doesn’t want to wait, or talk. 

Jaehyun grabs him by his hand, pushing him in his direction, and going upstairs. He knows he probably smells like cigarettes and booze, but Johnny doesn’t seem to bother it too much because he follows him without saying anything. Jaehyun is sure Johnny can read what he’s thinking, because he comes closer to Jaehyun’s body, piercing Jaehyun with passion in his glance.

The bedroom seems too far, but the wait makes Jaehyun’s almost numb with anticipation. He can’t deny that he have been desiring for this moment to happen, but always tried to hide it because it wasn’t appropriate for them to do anything, to get involved more than they already are.

It’s hot in the room, like everywhere else, but the heat seems to come from inside of Jaehyun, burning him completely. It was a new feeling, something he never experienced anything anywhere near what was going inside of him. Maybe the alcohol made things a little more intense, but Jaehyun can feel delight running through his body.

When in the bedroom, doors closed and lights out, Johnny takes charge and is the one to hold Jaehyun closer. This time Jaehyun can feel Johnny’s mismatched and more intense breath, but not very noticeable if Jaehyun wasn’t this close to him.

Jaehyun lays his hands on Johnny’s nape, caressing the spot, feeling shivers running in the location. In his head, Jaehyun thought he would want to kiss Johnny right away, fast and urgent. But they’re there, only staring at each other for a couple of minutes, the dim light coming from the window showing just some features from their faces. The eyes are still shining.

Johnny is the first to lean in Jaehyun’s direction, peeking softly in the other’s lips, almost asking for confirmation that that was what Jaehyun wanted too. Of course it was, and Jaehyun is the one to kiss him properly. 

It’s slow, calm and tender. Jaehyun is sure he tastes bitter like beer, but Johnny seems to not mind that at all. Kissing Johnny is all Jaehyun ever imagined and a little more. It’s warm and passionate, making Jaehyun want to melt right there in that moment. 

Things start to get more heated as the kiss starts to develop. Jaehyun can feel Johnny’s hands wander around his body, not stopping in one spot for too long. He’s surrounding Jaehyun, not only physically, but mentally. All Jaehyun can think about is Johnny, is sharing this moment with him, is  _ kissing him and wanting more _ . 

In a moment of lucidity, a thought crosses Jaehyun’s mind and he immediately breaks the kiss with Johnny.

Johnny seems lost, not understanding why Jaehyun did that “I don’t have any money with me.”

Again, they’re just looking at each other and the silence around them. Johnny lets out a chuckle, looking away from Jaehyun.

“You don’t need the money, nothing will happen. You’re too drunk for it, so don’t worry.” Jaehyun wants to say something, but he doesn’t know what “You said yourself that you didn’t want any intimacies, so we won’t do it.”

Johnny’s tone isn’t aggressive, rude or mad, but Jaehyun can feel that he isn’t as composed as he normally is.

  
  


“It’s still two hundred dolars for the kiss.” Johnny says, leaving the room.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hi!!! sorry for being so late with this chapter, i've been really busy and took me a little longer than i anticipated
> 
> hope it was a good reading for now heh sorry for any mistakes and feedbacks are always welcome!  
> thanks for reading and see you next time 
> 
> you can find me on twt [here](https://twitter.com/chsoobi) :)


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